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WHO's Your Daddy Part 2 - The Results are IN!

Updated: Oct 19, 2021

**Disclaimer**- had to change the names of people since this is ongoing and I don't want my new family to think I am F'n crazy!.... Yet.**
**WARNING!! ** This is an adult Blog with real life shit. I won't apologize for the language or the jokes. If I didnt have a sense of humor about this, I'd probably go insane. If you get offended easily, This might not be the blog for've been warned!****

We waited for these results for what seems like a 10 Fortnights (I had to Google how long a fortnight was - it's 2 weeks). Also, I'm not completely sure why I would use a measurement of time that hasn't been used since Peanut Butter was invented.. but I digress.

Honestly, growing up without a father was never really a big deal. I did all of the normal stuff that kids did. I played baseball, ran track, played video games.....

My mindset has always been to focus on the things that I can control. I mean.. Why spend time/energy on thinking or pursuing a person that doesn't even exist.. and most certainly doesn't know that I exist... that's just silly.

FINALLY - Friday August 20th

Your DNA results came in!!!

I was on a conference call on Friday when my phone dinged.

I yelled across the house to my wife "Hey my DNA results are in". I was in a meeting and not able to check my phone but I knew she would want to know. (She's asks about them every day)

I picked it up to look at it.. and ZOOM! My wife is gone with my phone in her hand....

.......Before I got to see the results!!!!!

My wife immediately grabbed my phone and ran into the other room to call my mom.

You see... IF any of the information was bad - my wife wanted to shield me from that immediately. I mean we wanted to find my dad, not find out I was some sort of Hitler baby or something.

She's in the room with my mom for what seemed like FOREVER... at this point I'm clearly not paying attention to whatever conference call I was supposed to be listening to. I was WAY more distracted by what my significant other was doing in the room with what would soon be "VITAL INFORMATION".

Clearly, my curiosity was getting to me at this point.

My wife walks in and says "You're never going to F'n believe it"... your mom thinks she knows who your dad might be"......

Wait, WHAT????!

**Stunned** - Because obviously after 41 years if my mom had known the name of my father or anything related.... she would have told me right?............

My wife asks if I've ever heard of the name Nonamaker?!

My mom tells the story like this. (Paraphrased)

When she was younger, her parents were in the military. They were stationed in Germany and she lived with her older brother in Pensacola, Fl. Her brother was a recruiter in the Marines. One of the guys he worked with was introduced to his sister... and Bam! As I mentioned in my first blog - my mom said she was a "Free Sprit" and was getting it in!

She immediately knew the name. (Which on a side note kind of upset me, because WHY wouldn't you have thought of that name over the last 40 years!!!!, but... I digress). Clearly, I'm over it and have no built up animosity at all.


She said they called him "Gunny" Nonamaker!

She was confused though..

She said there was no way this man could be my father.

He was VERY Latin and very dark complexioned. She said I was simply too light skinned for that to be a consideration. (Wait, What?). She didn't think it could be him... but the timing definitely lined up!!

Now I had several clues:

Last Name


He was Marine

"His wife was pregnant at the time" - Yikes!

How could I know for sure?

Now, when my uncle found out he completely shit his pants...I meant, he was responsible for her. He did what any big brother would do and he sent her ass immediately home to her mom and dad... Which was in Germany.

On January 5th 1980 I was born at the Rheinland Air Force Base in Landstuhl, Germany.

But what did the ANCESTRY DNA test say?????!!!...

Stay Tuned!

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